New Endings

Hah, i am back after forever?? hmph... well, i was relief teaching as some of you have already known. For those who do not know, i am teaching at Beatty Secondary School, my old secondary school. HAHA!! its been fun but exhausting.

More on other stuff. Its been very long since i last blogged. There are many things that i wanted to put down in my blog, but i seemed to have forgotten what i wanted to put down in this blog. A levels were long gone, now living life day by day, anxiety growing as i await the release of the A lvl results. I do not have a good feeling about this. But i still have to face it. I feel as if i have became stupid, especially after the "abstinence" from studying (not that i indulge in studying).

Hmph, well... other than teaching and going out with frens, my life has been rather boring... same rituals..... playing computer games and surfing the internet. I want to go out fishing, hiking, doing nonsense, more nonsense and wasting time..... I dunno why, but i just cant stay at home and stare into the computer screen like i used to before. I think that i am losing my thing for computers..... Duno if its for the better or for the worse..

Recently, i juz sat down at some coffeeshop and juz stared into empty space, enjoying the evening breeze, reflecting on what has happened so far for the past 19 years of my life. Its been kinda fufilling but still, there are things that i wished i had done that i did not do earlier. The more i think, the "sadder" i become. I dun rly know how to express this feeling, but yea....

I dread april..... i juz wish april never comes..... I have to enter NS and my fitness has gone back to square one, being unfit, after so much effort i put into training for napfa last year. I keep telling myself that i have to go running, but all i have done was to go to the gym twice.... which sucked... coz going twice only helped me make my body ache.

Anyway, i hope a more interesting month lies ahead, oh wait, i dont have to hope coz january was as boring as it could get. anyway, tata

Lame stuff

Your dating personality profile: Stylish - You do not lack for fashion sense. Style matters. You wouldn't want to be seen with someone who doesn't care about her appearance. Liberal - Politics matters to you, and you aren't afraid to share your left-leaning views. You would never be caught voting for a conservative candidate. Big-Hearted - You are a kind and caring person. Your warmth is inviting, and your heart is a wellspring of love.

Your Top Ten Traits 1. Stylish 2. Liberal 3. Big-Hearted 4. Romantic 5. Traditional 6. Adventurous 7. Sensual 8. Shy 9. Wealthy/Ambitious 10. Practical

Your date match profile: Wealthy/Ambitious - You seek someone with goals, someone to whom success is important. You would like for this person to open up new experiences and opportunities for you. Stylish - You cannot put up with someone who is lacking in style. You want an original, someone with flare, someone with good taste. Adventurous - You are looking for someone who is willing to try new things and experience life to its fullest. You need a companion who encourages you to take risks and do exciting things.

Your Top Ten Match Traits 1. Wealthy/Ambitious 2. Stylish 3. Adventurous 4. Outgoing 5. Traditional 6. Practical 7. Romantic 8. Sensual 9. Intellectual 10. Conservative

Take the Dating Profile Quiz at Would I Date You

Last few moments in NYJC

Before I wrap up life in NYJC ( which was a fruitful one or rather, to be more specific, a rollercoaster ride ), I want to seize one of the last few opportunities that I have left to blog, as a student, using the school computer. So right now, here I am in the school library typing this blog entry which will probably sum up what I have to say about my eventful jc life.

Oh boy, I can still remember, vividly, the first few days when I was posted into Nanyang JC. I kept on thinking, why did I not work hard enough to enter Anderson JC (near my house, known for their academics), and how NYJC was very “cheena” and stuff, I almost asked for a transfer out after I got the posting of the provisional admissions exercise. But soon after I stepped into the school, I rubbished any thoughts of leaving NYJC, the culture here might be “cheena” , but I appreciate it, I have never experienced a school with such a large population that was as tightly knitted as Nanyang’s.

Well, life here has been tough, full of surprises and stuff, some pleasant, others, not so. But I’ve learnt to handle problems, big or small. During my life in Nanyang, I have answered quite a number of the infinite questions of life. I can’t help but to wonder how some people can’t seem to have anything and some people have it all, how some people feel, how others perceive life and death. Those are questions that are probably going to be left unanswered in my life, because it is almost certain that the future is becoming more and more uncertain.

Before I waste my life away, while waiting to be enlisted into the army, I would really appreciate having coffee at a coffeeshop, watching people go by and just wonder, how they would be feeling, who are those they love, what if they happen to leave their loved ones behind, how would they feel? And to whom do they seek when in need of divine help. For me, I can’t really seek for divine help, for I do not have a god. Sometimes I can’t help but to wonder, who is god? I recently watched a movie called “The island”, its quite an old show. This particular mechanic defined god as the person who would not do anything whenever u close your eyes and murmur to yourself, asking for help. So who/what is god? Only god knows…….. (hmmmmmm….???)

I just realized something, There was this one instance where Mrs Tan, (Gp tutor), said something which went along the lines of “as you grow older, you tend to ask many more questions”. I certainly seemed to have abided by her philosophy. I think many people will find what I am about to say weird, so brace yourselves. I can’t wait to find out how it feels like to die and to find out if there is life after death, if I will ever be reincarnated (if there is such a thing). There are just too many voids in life which science has not filled up. I am not sure if I will live long enough to answer these questions.

Oh well, lets revert to MY philosophy, I believe in only 3 days today, tomorrow and yesterday, so lets take one step at a time and not think too far into the future.

Tata..

BORED

I know i said not to blog till the end of the A lvls, but here i am, down with the pox, staring at the same four walls, confined till I am well.
recently i took this test on what my future will be like. though i think that it is not quite possible, but still, its something which i hope will come true.

You live in a mansion. You'll make $900,000 a year. You own a limo. Your job will be either a doctor or scientist. Your husband/wife will be lazy, spoiled, attractive and social. You'll only have one kid. You'll die at forty because of alcohol. Yes, you'll make it to heaven!

Another test i took....... cant remember what it was but here is the result...

You take the problems of others with you wherever you go. In your spare time you try to think of some way to resolve the dilemmas of your friends. You have an attraction to those who are in need and you feel that you always have to contribute in some way to make those around you like you. The respect of others is important to you.

Outing+bbq

Yesterday was well.... not as fun as i had expected it to be. however, the movie mamamia was the first musical that i had actually not slept in. It was funny and it had songs which i enjoyed.
Before and after the movie, we played pool, we went bowling... haah.... no mood to tell the whole story... haiz...
then go bbq... makan... lawl... sommore...
sian.... i really no mood type le... sorry... a rubbish entry.. i promise i will sit down to type a proper entry some time soon.

PRELIM OVER!!

YAY! prelims are finally over... bored of studying... i wanna just sleep lol! aiya... juz played a hell lot of CS... damn fun! tired lol... play so long haha...... nites... i will write a real post real soon

EMO stuff

I just discovered who are my true friends. In life, there are your typical hypocrites, posers and those who are pretty blatant about things, but the people i hate the most are the hypocrites. There was this period in time, where chance gave me THE perfect opportunity to see right through this person. Obviously, I am not going to reveal any critical information, so do not try to glean/infer/guess who the person is.
To be fair, I might have overead the situation and "spiced" it up, but judging from his/her past history and what he/her treated me these few days, i highly doubt that i am wrong.
I know i should not be writing this now, for tomorrow, my gp tutor beckons me towards the hall for the all-so-important GP prelims. However, I feel that it is really important for me to get this off my chest so that i can have a clear mind for tomorrow. To describe how i feel now in words is a mammoth task for me to do, but for the sake of you people reading my blog, i will attempt the impossible, with my limited vocabulary. To put it simply, I WAS a shackled dove, NOW i am liberated and i feel more at ease.
Oh well... now to prepare for the exams.